Recently, my pattern is to write these lists in the mornings, before the children wake up, as a way to reflect on the previous day before I start the new one.  So each day I catalog the possibilities for gratitude before I go to bed, so I have something to work with in the mornings while my brain is beginning to emerge from sleep.

Sometimes that stew of anxiety-producing news and political analysis that mixes with the personal anxieties of the daily can stir up to a rather potent brew.  This week, in particular, I have felt how the practice of gratitude has helped to ground me in the midst of anxiety, how it keeps bringing my mind to a solid perch amidst the what-ifs that want to shake me loose.

Does it seem to be against the point to say that a daily gratitude practice has helped me understand my challenging emotions more fully?  Why do something that gets me in touch with anxiety or fear or fury or despair?  But this has truly been part of the grace of this practice for me.  Particularly in this past year, I feel as though I have owned some of these strong emotions.  Throughout an anxious day yesterday, each time I picked up a thread of gratitude, that brought me to a quiet and grounded place.  When I went back to the emotional tasks of the day, I found myself saying, “Oh, that thing I was feeling was fear.  I was afraid I would not be equal to this task before us.”  Because I could hold on to this grounded gratitude piece, I could be more present in the moment during anxious times, and name the challenging feelings I was feeling.  I think.  I hope.

Of course, it doesn’t have to be gratitude that does it.  I have been trying to live in a more mindful and conscious way for years.  Mindfulness is a powerful practice.  For me, in these recent years, practicing gratitude has helped me move to a deeper level of mindfulness.  I have a long way to go, but it’s nice to be able to look around and notice a little bit of a forward shift on the journey.

Gratitude List:
1.  Voices that encourage me/us to be listening for the Wind of change, to keep loving hearts open
2.  Fireflies rising in the dusk
3.  In the middle of the Old Bridge, several of the new lights are veiled in cobwebs that shiver and glimmer in the river breeezes
4.  Working together to find solutions to challenges
5.  Circles upon circles of community.  I love my people, all of you, in all these many circles.

May we walk in Beauty!