Just Beneath the Words

Day 4 Prompt: Begin with Just Beneath________

Just beneath the words
which you have placed with such care
into the bowl on the table
there is an empty room
with walls of blue
and a folding chair.

Just there, outside the window
is a tree with three small leaves
which quiver in the winter wind.

Just above the tree a crow is flying.
You have been speaking its name
into the wooden bowl.
Its name is not Despair.

Just inside the sun-whitened skull of the crow
in the leaves on the hillside
squats a tiny brown toad.
It listens for the sound
of your name in the wind.

Addressing Fear

Poem-a-Day Day 3 Prompt:  Write a poem that scares you.
This one is really challenging me.  The worst fears that I could
conjure are the negatives to the work that I have chosen to
do in the world.  I do not want to speak it.

This is the four o’clock ramble
the tumble into chasms
the angst that awakens me into the story
of the world I fear I have delivered these children to:

Where the grab and the fist
assure the rights and privilege
of Me and Mine above all else.

Where rage is the fuel that carries
the fool between apathies.

Where greed is the creed,
and the goal of existence
is the next shiny trinket
constructed of toxins by slaves
in some faraway land.

A world without spinners
and dyers and knitters and painters,
where poets write ad copy,
where wonders on a screen
fascinate more utterly
than feather, stone or tree.

I can write no more of this.
My hand is frozen into a claw
A roaring fills my ears.
I dare not let this story
see any more light of day.

I’ll tidy up the mess of negative emotions at the end here with a
Joseph Campbell quotation: “The cave you fear to enter holds
the treasure that you seek.”

Always We Begin Again

Over the years, I have developed a rather harsh and untenable internal critic, which has paralyzed my writing process. I’ve worked myself into a claustrophobic little writer’s strait-jacket, and writing has become anxious rather than fulfilling.

Recently, I have become aware that, on Facebook, I am writing something–obsessively–every day, and occasional little bits and bobs that satisfy me. I had a sudden revelation: I could use the energy of my Facebook addiction like the moon shot. The gravitational pull of the social medium can draw me into the discipline of writing every day.

I have been a sporadic journal-writer for years. I’ll start writing regularly and abandon the project after days or weeks or months. I wrote Morning Pages, a la The Artist’s Way, for a year or so, but couldn’t wade back through all the material to make it meaningful to me. I write poems and abandon the scraps of paper and the half-edited doodles.

We’ll just have to see how I do with this blog. I’m not making huge promises to myself, but I will begin with a set of ground rules. I am going to try to post something every day or two, whether it’s a long prose ramble, a scratched-together poem, or a gratitude list. I’ll give myself grace for occasional hiccups in that rhythm. I’m using Writer’s Digest’s 2012 November Poem-A-Day Chapbook Challenge to push myself to get the rhythm going. I have to put something down every day, even if I feel squirmy and uncomfortable with what I write. So be it.

My parents talk about incorporating rhythms into their life like the Benedictine monks–daily, hourly moments of spiritual focus and contemplative attention. One of the books they have studied is a little booklet that fits in the palm of the hand called Always We Begin Again. This is my mantra for the coming Writing Time in my life–no shame for past laziness, paralysis, purple writing. Just pick up again, write the next word, the next sentence, the next poem.

And that internal critic?  The one who eats me up from the inside?  I’m replacing her with the Mockingbird.  Rather a harsh name for a critic, I know.  But Mockingbird sits in the treeline and listens to me mutter while I harvest cauliflower or feed and water the chickens.  He tells me just to say whatever comes to mind.  If it doesn’t come out right the first time, repeat it endlessly until it does, say it in Swahili, Hindi, Chinese, Pig-Latin.  I’m going to start listening to him.

Mention the Moon

Poem-a-Day, Day 2 Prompt:  Write about the Full Moon.

You need not wade through the mists and bogs to reach the moon.
You need not climb a ladder of cobweb.
You need not ride the stallions that wicker in the sea’s pounding surf.

Draw back the curtain and open the window.
Breathe the bracing air and listen:
The whinny of an owl, the click of the bat,
The grunt of a buck and the distant roar of the train.

The full moon will spill a milky road before you.
That is all the pathway you will need.

Beginning with Poem-A Day

November Poem-a-Day Challenge.
Day 1 Prompt: Write something about matches. 
Oh my.  Here goes:

Then there was the one about the witch
who walked into a bar
in search of a match.

I don’t recall the punchline, though
I know she’d lost her broom,
and snow was in her hair.

Perhaps she’d lost her wand as well,
forgotten the Latin words
for ignite, combust, enkindle.

I heard she called a taxi
before she wandered out into the wind,
leaving behind her the scent of sulfur and jasmine.