Mr. Rogers

Gratitude List:
1.  For Jon, who was born today, a few years ago, who bought himself his birthday present so that I could have the boys give it to him: four Family Circus books that we haven’t read.  Don’t tell the kids–they think he was truly surprised.
2.  Buy one, get one free: fudge brownies for the birthday celebration from La Dolce Vita.  If you live near Lancaster, this is the place to go for your birthday party supplies.  And this one may seem more indulgently mundane than usual, but the experience was sublime.
3.  Lighten Up Lancaster and the Lancaster Chamber of Commerce: I know that might sound dull and organizational, except that it isn’t, because these are local organizations that are pouring their energy into connecting local eaters with local farmers.
4.  Mr. Rogers.  He died eleven years ago today.  I do believe he was a saint or boddhisattva or something.  My apologies to my FB friends who’ve been inundated by my favorite neighbor’s quotations today, but here’s my favorite of the lot: “If you could only sense how important you are to the lives of those you meet; how important you can be to the people you may never even dream of. There is something of yourself that you leave at every meeting with another person.”
5.  Inner warmth, to help me contend with the outer cold.

May we walk in Beauty!

There Was Going to Be a Poem

There was going to be a poem about the little birds,
but that didn’t happen.  Of course, all the poems come back,
at some point, to the little birds, so there’s that.
And then I would have been writing about shame,
or rather, I did write about shame.  For days.
But then I never took it past the messy draft,
and so this big space opened up and then the bit about grief
started to rise like dough in the back of the oven
near the pilot light.  But I’m sort of an amateur myself
when it comes to grief.  And I don’t want experience–
please, Universe, keep me naive on that score–
but I want to know how to hold it, because it’s always there
in the soup we swim in, always edging up to someone,
somewhere.  And I want to know how to hold it,
because it is part of the essential story, yours,
and someone else’s, too.  Not just Mary watching her son
die up there on that hill.  It is, well, part of the soup.
And then there are, of course, the little birds,
and the way they hover over the flowers at sunset
or dart through the brush, whisper-like and timid.
The way shadows grow over the fields in the afternoon
and the breezes begin to settle into the hollow.

Gratitude List:
1.  Friends who, intentionally or inadvertently, light a fire under me when I need it most.
2.  Considering the semantic shading of gratefulness and gratitude.
3.  Vermilion
4.  The wild excitement of coming down the home stretch on a long-term project.
5.  Re-fashioning, re-crafting, re-purposing, re-making, and not just in the realm of the physical, you know?

May we walk in Beauty!

Tomatoes

Keeping a youngster on task with homework tonight is taking just about all the psychic energy that I can muster.  I was going to try my hand at a prose poem, inspired by the work of Kristy Bowen in the current BloodLotus, but I’ll just give you the link to that and let you be inspired, too.  I am especially fond of the one about the birds.

Gratitude List:
1.  The Mystery of a tomato seed,
2.  how it contains within its tiny envelope
the blueprint of a jungly tomato plant,
3.  how it waits, still in the cool soil,
for its moment,
4.  then cracks through its little shell
with root always downward
and sprout reaching up and out,
5.  to create its very own fruit and seeds.

May we walk in Beauty!

We Muddle Through

Gratitude List:
1.  The way gill-over-the-ground stands up in the holes in the snow made by my footprints, face to the sun, ready for greening.
2.  The way the swans winked in and out of my sight against the clouds, as though they were shifting between worlds.
3.  The way the house finch sat in the top of the maple and sang and sang its heart out to the sun.
4.  The way the willows are turning that pre-green yellow.
5.  These quotes from today:
“You have built a place in my story.”
“We muddle through with the wisdom and the courage that we have.”
Bonus:
6.  Courage.  Remembering that it is couer-age (heart, hearten, enheart).  I hear you speak your truth even when it is difficult and painful, when it’s hard to trust, when you’re angry, when you’re shy, when you don’t think you’ll find the right words–and it en-heart-ens me, en-couer-ages me.  Thank you for that gift.  You are so full of heartening courage.  I am incredibly grateful for the ways that you teach me.

So much love.
May we walk in Beauty.

Birds of Skunk Hollow

Somewhere in the wood,
mourning dove sings of desire:
“Who and who and who?”
Then, from deep in the bamboo,
the owl answers, “You, you, you.”

Gratitude List:
1.  Synchronicity.  People in very different places of my life this week have recommended that I read the very same two authors.
2.  Owl and dove
3.  Sun and thaw and thaw and thaw.
4.  Will forces
5.  Poppy jasper

May we walk in Beauty!

Are You Dancing?

“Is the wind at your back?” asked my friend Saheeb when I saw him today.  “Are you dancing?”

What a marvelous greeting!
How is the universe conspiring to show you your truest self?  
Is the sun shining on your face?
Have you answered the invitation to heal the world?
What does the rhythm of the cosmos tell you?
Is the wind at your back?
Are you finding the keys to your desires?
Are you dancing?

Gratitude List:
1.  Helpful questions from a compassionate heart
2.  Reminders that sometimes it’s okay to stall, to rest, to wait, to pause: this is different from paralysis or stagnation, though it’s hard for me sometimes to tell the difference.
3.  Playing with the stones at the shop.  I named one large piece of iron ore The Stone of the Waking Dragon
4.  Staying attuned and awake.  This is a blessing and also painful, but still I am grateful to be awake and awakening, to be part of it all. 
5.  Two five-egg days in a row!

May we walk in Beauty.

Transpiration

2014 January 103

I always have to think a moment before I say that one.
Is it transpiration or transubstantiation?
Perhaps it doesn’t matter.
The snow is transmuted before our eyes
from one sort of substance into another,
mystical and magical, a sacred event,
rising like a breath in a haze above the white fields.

Trans-spire.
Change of spirit.
Altered breath.

I know my own spirit rose,
transformed,
to watch the wraiths of haze lift
upward into blue sky
where gulls were flying
south to north and north to south.
My heart joined them in that dance.

Gratitude List:
1.  Collaborative art.  This one began as a squiggle.  “I’ll draw and you color,” said Joss.  I took a little heat for interpreting it into a drawing instead of keeping it abstract, but he’s satisfied now that it’s done.  The scanner washed out the color a little.  It’s called “Checkers Turtle climbs the ladder to the stars.”
2.  Kombucha
3.  THAW
4.  Helping out at Preschool today
5.  Left foot, right foot, breathe.

May we walk in Beauty.

Sun

Gratitude List:

1.  Sun on snow.  The sound of thaw.
2.  Sun dogs
3.  Elements
4.  Rwandan coffee
5.  Clearing

Color

Gratitude List:
1.  All the bright colors people were wearing this morning: bright pink and lavender/violet, vibrant blues and reds.  My spirit needed just those colors.
2.  Enriching conversation
3.  Grapefruit
4.  The way that pretending can sometimes actually make a thing so.  I am pretending to manage through all this snow and cold, and sometimes I almost actually enjoy it.  Sometimes I am coping.
5.  Engaging / not engaging.  Sometimes knowing when to choose the right one.

May we walk in Beauty.

Faerie Snow

“Don’t count your sheep,” says Ellis, “until the wolf is gone.”

Gratitude List:
1.  Chocolate and a burger for grounding
2.  The Emergency Women’s Shelter at the YWCA
3.  10 hours of sleep–winter hibernation-style
4.  The way the snow glows blue from inside?  Have you noticed?  What makes it do that, I wonder?  I’m thinking it’s the faeries.
5.  All my Valentines, you and you and someone else: we draw these webs between us,
made of chocolate and sunlight and tentative smiles
and Facebook notes and photos of the places we love
and the toothy grins of our children
and the hope of helping out a little bit
and seeking our roots and our sources together
and following traditions
and breaking traditions
and going a little bit wilder
and dancing until the chickens come home to roost.

Much love.  May we walk in Beauty!